Tuesday, May 24, 2011


Do you know what Pyramid Power is? Pyramid Power is what cats would believe if they suddenly found themselves in human bodies. Have you ever seen a cat like perfectly place itself in a doorway so half of it was in and half of it was out? It thinks being like that in a doorway is a magical physical position that's going to help it live forever! That is a fucking Pyramid Power belief in action. Okay, so now that you know the real true facts about Pyramid Power, go ahead and read the Wikipedia entry. It's the best collection of fake information I've ever seen in one place together! It's gold surrounding dead people; it's a wonder of the world; it's a bowl of fruit that stays ripe forever. Let us make a found poem out of it:

Mock the Idea of Pyramid Power

I have built with cardboard 
some pyramids you can see,
........which first appeared 
in print in 1970. The concept 
........of pyramid power is: 
an open pyramid large enough 
to meditate under! Stand inside 
the Great Pyramid as a pyramid 
power. Function as a thought-
form incubator. Increase the rotting 
ability of one half of the apple. 
Sharpen the sharpness of razor 
blades. Improve the quality of wine 
within. These small carcasses 
are not decaying. Their structure 
is somehow preserving them. 
Small fish and the little piece 
of meat still hanging. Stumble
........across a force. Trigger 
sexual urges! Convince the Onan
family! Stand inside the Great 
Pyramid and release – release
books titled Pyramid Power.
Some people are so energized 
they cannot cope with the “dynamo 
..........effects” they experience.


M-----l said...

Trigger sexual urges!

I read that line and thought it was a reference to Winnie-the-Pooh's tiger friend. I wasn't even slightly shocked as I thought it would be just like you to write a poem that talked about that bouncy stuffed tiger wanting to fuck something...probably Piglet.

Then I realized it was "Trigger" not "Tigger".

Patricia Lockwood said...

If that bouncy stuffed tiger wants to fuck ANYTHING it is Christopher Robin

beth coyote said...

I bet you don't know this but, speaking of pyramids-there is a product called 'teepee pee-pee". It's a leetle cloth 'tent' you throw over an infant penis when changing his diapers so you and/or he don't get peed on.

Just thought you'd like to add this to your collection of arcane and useless facts.

Whimsy said...

My cat isn't half in and half out. She's usually on one side of a door, wanting to be on the other side. It doesn't matter, of course, which side she's on to begin with.

jorg wobblington lopez said...

I heard about pyramid power 5 or 6 years ago and it was mentioned off hand. I'm glad you mentioned it again, and your poem is amazing as usual.

Patricia Lockwood said...

Ahhhh why do I not get comment notifications anymore, much sorriness to my rad commenters who got abandoned up in this box