Wednesday, May 19, 2010

A Note from My Mother

Apologies for my long absence--it turns out that when you live in a fancy town, people come visit you all day every day and then you never have time to write your Daniel Boone persona poems. Christ my life is hard!



This is the Beast Stein that I bought Elegant Choice for his birthday. It has a fox for a handle, as you can see, and boars in mid-leap, and one noble deer pronging another noble deer in the stomach. But where is the hunter? The hunter is the one who drinks from the stein. You are the hunter, and your presence is required in the scene! It's the most postmodern cup I've ever seen in my life. I could feel the presence of this Beast Stein pulsing in my neighborhood, but I wasn't sure exactly where it was, so I set out on foot to search for it. While I was walking, a lady in a minivan leaned out of her window and hissed SLUT at me. I can't tell what prompted it--my jeans, my cardigan, or the giant biography of Daniel Boone that I happened to be carrying.

3 comments:

Admiral Farragut said...

Perhaps she thinks that a girl who will say Yes to Carrots will say yes to anything.

Richard Epstein said...

As it happens, I attended Daniel Boone Elementary School, so I know about these things, and I am quite sure it was your cardigan.

Patricia Lockwood said...

NICE ONE, ADMIRAL

It was a very proper cardigan, Richard! And it was taupe, which is in my opinion the least slutty color of all.