Saturday, February 23, 2008

ITEM

Elegant Choice makes fun of me for putting cream in my tea. I thought that was what tea wanted, to have cream in it. He has even tried to undermine me by "accidentally" purchasing half-and-half when he goes to the store alone. It tastes like poison--the poison of insubordination. Maybe I'll move to England, where cream is taken seriously. There is even a Chart! There are Rules!
Restrictions on the use of certain names of cream

6.—(1) The name which appears in column 1 of the table in paragraph (2) below shall not be used in the labelling of any cream as the name of the cream, whether or not qualified by other words, unless the cream complies with the requirements specified in column 2 below opposite that name except that the relevant requirement as to milk fat content need not be complied with if the name contains qualifying words which indicate that the milk fat content of the cream is greater or less than that specified in column 2 of paragraph (1) of this regulation, as the case may be.

It doesn't even make sense, which is what I like. It's settled; I will move to England and live by her Cream Rules forever.

6 comments:

Harry said...

Taken seriously perhaps, but not put in tea. Not by anyone I've ever met, anyway. We have something over here that we call 'milk'.

Tricia said...

Tea is so controversial! If you like milk in your tea, why wouldn't you like cream? Cream is milk to the milk power.

Harry said...

I've never actually *tried* tea with cream, obviously, because that would just be wrong.

Traditionally the British have a very strong emotional investment in tea and the correct way to make it, despite the fact that we actually mainly drink strong cheap black Indian tea made with boiling water so that it's as bitter and thick as possible and you have to put lots of milk and possibly sugar just to make it palatable.

Personally, being a girly-man, I prefer green tea or oolong without anything in it. And most of the time I drink coffee.

Tricia said...

I drink quite a bit of green tea myself--when I'm feeling rich, that is. Those monkeys have got to get paid.

Jee Leong Koh said...

Green tea? Bah! How about a Chinese tea with the name of Metal Guan Yin?

Tricia said...

Pour it into me, friend. POUR IT INTO ME.