I have something of a flair for meat, I am discovering, though each new foray presents its own challenges. How would a ham-hand look, I asked myself, and here is your breathtaking answer. Notice how fully he is studded with cloves; notice how his face is a flapping slice. Also, did you know that there exists no Wikipedia page for Mary Jo Bang? Which is disconcerting, because I think of her as being at least as famous as, say, Adelaide Crapsey.