In Georgia, Happiness Can Be Purchased for Two Dollars at the Local Goodwill

You are asking yourself what is the news? The news is this: we moved our bodies into a miniature apartment in Savannah, Georgia, and busied ourselves making it homey.

Fuck you, SCAD students, I have my own ideas about design! You're looking at a limited edition Anne Geddes Leopard Baby just straight up nailed to the wall. Priceless! That shit is discontinued! Anyway, all praise to a city that provides me with boerewors to eat while reading the 1978 Harlequin classic To Tame a Vixen, set on the South African veld. Whenever possible I try to harmonize what I eat with what I read. Imagine my UTTER DISGUST when I finally managed to scare up a Big Turk to devour during the relevant portions of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.

Anyway, the best thing about living in Georgia IS THE POLITICS. Politicians here love nothing more than putting disparaging rat art into their campaign videos, and why? It must be because they love me.

I Will Be Honest, I Did Not Spend Much Time on This Drawing At All

This violent visual...handjob, given by Art to the English language, hangs in splendor on the wall of the local Panera Bread. Question for the artist: WHY DID YOU HAVE THIS IDEA? Every day of my life I encounter more people who are confused about the minimum requirements of a pun. It is not enough, for instance, to write, "a stitch in time saves dog," above a drawing of a crying dog getting his foot sewed back on. Or wait a minute, maybe it IS enough! I can't not make a pun even when I try!
Pretty sure they have butts like that.